I was different than before

I looked at my reflection on the glass window as I neatly wore my Amamat on my head. I tucked in any strands of hair that hung in front of my forehead. I needed to look good for my prayers.

I looked at my reflection again and remembered Shafiq telling me, "Since when did you become so Islamic?" in which I replied, "It happened slowly". My image and my attitude was totally different now compared to last year. My hair used to be short. I used to keep eye contact with any girl I see. I walked with pride, my head would be up to show confidence, and I would walk slowly to look 'cool' and catch a girl's attention. I would have a common expression on my face that looked like some sort of gangster from the movies. I would talk in such confidence, acting cocky while being funny. An experiment which makes girls like you, in the end flirt with you. That was me a year ago when I first started college.

Now I look to the ground as I walk. I try to put a smile whenever I talk to people. I'm still trying to get used to talking with kindness and honesty. Even if I joke, I don't lie to make people laugh anymore. I try to keep away from getting into a flirty situation with a girl. I always think, what if I had a wife. How would she react if she sees me having fun or sitting next to a non-mehram girl, or touching the girl's hands or even looking at her eyes. What would my wife think? How sure are you that the girl you've dated for such a long time would be your perfect wife? Would you have as much fun as when you both dated? Or will there be a time when both of you would get bored of each other? i've left the dating game andI've left trying to impress girls with attractive qualities. We should all look forward to impressing Allah.

I picked up my roller perfume and rolled some sweet scents on my left palm. Then I rubbed both my palms together and rubbed them on my neck. I needed to smell good too. Alright, ready for prayers, I thought. I stood on the green praying mat, faced the direction of the Ka'ba, lifted both my hands to the level of my shoulders and said, "Allahuakbar".